Woo your loved one with these magical expressions of love
Ahh….French, the language of love. So soft to the ear, it can win over and woo anyone, including the French themselves.
The French can be quietly murmuring about filling-in their tax forms, and most women would surely react to these supposed French Love Phrases like Jamie Lee Curtis in that famous scene in the film a Fish Called Wanda. Here it is, though John is talking in Italian and Russian, but you get the idea.
Not very safe for work
Here’s a funny story. My wife is French. I’ve been with her over 20 years. What’s funny about that you may be musing? Well, consider this, my curious friend, I am English, and if there is one thing you must know about the English, it is that the typical English male, in Latin Homo Patheticus, is born with a gene that makes it very hard to talk to women without breaking out into a cold sweat.
Curious and curiouser, I’m sure you’re thinking, with a finely-arched eyebrow. And consider this. From the ages of 4 to 18, I went to an all-boys school. Girls were things that we dreamed about but never saw, like mermaids and fairies.
“Ah, but I’m sure you had a sister to help you learn about the mysterious opposite sex“, you are probably wondering, now relying heavily on the other finely-arched eyebrow. But no! I only have one brother, one younger brother, who went to the same school on me, and who relied on me for advice about girls when quite frankly, my beautiful, dear reader, I had none to give.
So imagine my huge mountain-like pile of fear when the woman who would one day be my wife told me that she was French. “Help!” you could have heard me scream from the comfort on the very chair you’re now sitting in. “Give me some French love phrases so I can seduce this beautiful maiden within 5 minutes instead of having to embarrass myself and toil over the next 3 years to get her to feel sorry for me and give in to my weak attempts at seduction!”. Sadly, my enlightened friend, I had no beautiful romantic French words to tell her, and so yes, she eventually fell for me because she had no other choice.
So I feel like I have to spare you my pain. If you are a hopeful man and need to seduce an expectant French goddess, then these French love phrases will surely help you with your Herculean task. And if you are a woman who wants to understand what all the fuss is about, then these too will make it all crystal clear.
However, if you are here because you want to seduce a French man, then I’m afraid these won’t work. It is a Frenchman’s life’s essence, his very soul has been moulded to seduce. So if he hasn’t already whispered French phrases of amour to you, then I would think about quietly moving on to someone else.
Right, so feeling romantic? Feeling in the mood for some French love? Here we go, hold on, it’s going to be a rocky ride.
|Excuse me – would you mind terribly if I were to offer you a drink?||Excusez-moi – mais cela ne vous dérangerait pas si je vous propose un petit verre ?|
|I’ve been watching you for a while and I’ve finally summoned the courage to talk to you||Ca fait un moment que je vous regarde et j’ai enfin rassemblé mon courage pour vous parler|
|Your eyes are bluer than the sky and more alive than a farm in Spring||Vos yeux sont encore plus bleus que le ciel et plus vivants qu’une ferme en Printemps|
|It’s only been about five minutes but I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with you||Ca fait seulement quelques minutes mais je pense réellement que je suis en train de tomber amoureux de vous|
|Oh this little trinket? I bought it for you because you are more precious to me than the finest silk||Oh ce petit bijou ? Je l’ai acheté pour toi car tu es plus précieuse pour moi que la soie la plus fine|
|I love you – in fact I don’t just love you – I can’t live without you. Seriously if you were to leave me than I would no longer exist||Je t’aime. En fait – ce n’est pas juste que je t’aime – c’est aussi que je ne peux pas vivre sans toi. Je suis sérieux. Si tu me quittes je n’existe plus|
|Why is it every time I look at you the angels sing; the clouds disappear; the sun shines and the world seems that little bit more heavenly?||Pourquoi est-ce que chaque fois que je te regarde les anges chantent ; les nuages s’en vont ; le soleil brille ; et le monde semble un petit peu plus divin ?|
|I must say you’re looking quite fit. Have you been working out?||Je dois dire que tu as l’air vachement en forme. Tu fais un peu de sport ?|
|My heart hurts and it’s not indigestion. I really think I love you||J’ai mal au coeur et ce n’est pas de l’indigestion. Je pense vraiment que je t’aime|
|Your smile is more radiant than the lights on a lighthouse||Ton sourire est plus radieux que des lumières sur un phare|
And so there you have it. With some candles (don’t burn yourself), some fine red wine, and some soft French music, she’ll be like putty in your hands. Well, not literally. I never really understood that expression. Is she literally supposed to melt? I’d rather she reacted like a Jamie did (see above). I’m sure that if you use any of these French love phrases then this is exactly what will happen.
Please try them out and come back to me here with your results.